All of us have compared ourselves to others at one point. We have to stop this! I remember when I was a teenager and in my early twenties sometimes I would find myself saying, “Why can I have what she has? or “When is it my turn?” This is not a good way to think. I had to change that. Over the years I have matured and learned from these ups and down. When I find myself comparing myself to others I tell myself to stop and pray 🙂
Two weeks ago I was watching a video from Scandalous Beauty called Stop Comparing Yourself to Others Now. This was perfect timing because I was thinking about this topic for my Dear Twenty Something Series. Whenever you are feeling down or feel like someone has it better than you I urge you to STOP comparing yourself to others NOW!
We have to remember we are all special and created uniquely in God’s eyes. Realize your talents, find your passion and purpose in life. I think that sometimes when we find ourselves comparing ourselves with others we might actually be questioning what we want for ourselves. For example, if you are comparing yourself to someone who is fit and lives a healthy lifestyle don’t compare yourself. Instead use that as motivation (not to get to their fit level), but as motivation for you get fit on your own terms. You have to figure out what you want. Write it in your journal.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others:
1. Realize that the only person you should be comparing yourself is you:
Think back to how you were yesterday and how you are today. Everyday I strive to learn something new about myself or learn something new in general. Things take the 3 P’s: Patience, Practice and Persistence. If you work at it you will be great at it. 🙂
2. Take a step back and pray:
Many times when you feel this way you are overworked, stressed or not happy with your current situation. Take some time off whether its minutes or up to a week (or more). Take the time you need to unwind and reflect on how much you have grown. Pat yourself on the back. You go girl! What God has for you is for YOU! Remember you have a destiny that is unique for you.
3. Don’t be so hard on yourself:
Many times we compare ourselves to others because we are too hard on ourselves. I used to be a perfectionist and workaholic, but over the years I learned about having balance. Balance is the key to having a well-rounded life and being happy. It’s okay if you want to cry, let it out. If you are having a rough patch in your life a good cry now and then will help you. Talk to someone about how you feel. I love talking to my mother because she always tells me what I need to hear and motivates me to be the best M.E. I can be. Mothers are the best 🙂
4. Don’t worry about what they are doing:
People are not sharing the most difficult times with their life with you. Especially with the age of social media comparing yourself to others is easier to do because everyone is flashing their relationships, material things and lifestyle all over the place. This is why I say it is a good idea to take a social media break here and there.
Congrats to Scandalous Beauty on her new business: The Haute Blogger – check it out!
Congrats to Andrea Lewis on her Webseries: Black Actress – This webseries is so funny!
Congrats to Shameless Maya: on her move to LA and all her moves she is making and she has many cool videos on her channel!
This is what I like to see: women doing great things 🙂
How do you stop yourself from comparing yourself to others? Share below.